Why Is Starting so Hard?

Getting to the top seems so overwhelming. Starting the journey is often the hardest part.

Why is starting the hardest part? Staring at a blank page before you decide on the first words? Saving the first dollar? Making today the day you actually eat the salad and exercise, rather than saying, “I’ll start tomorrow”?

I am reading Marie Forleo’s Everything is Figureoutable and chapter seven is titled, “Start Before You’re Ready.” She writes that “all progress begins with a brave decision.” Often times, the decision is the easiest part; deciding to eat healthy, work out, save money. Pulling the trigger and starting today is the hard part. Certainly, making the decision and ultimately the plan is essential, but it’s so easy to say, “I will start tomorrow, next week, next month …” She further explains that “Action spans courage, not the other way around” and then “bodies in motion tend to stay in motion” (cue nightmare flashback to high school physics), but she’s totally right. Action begets motivation and action. When I start eating better, I am more motivated to continue. But deciding to eat salad over pizza that first time is one of the hardest parts.

I often feel like this when I am scrapbooking or stamping. I sit down and stare at a blank piece of cardstock and do not know where to start. I have worked out a system for scrapbooking though. I will start a layout, but rarely finish it in the same sitting (unless I have tons of time and can work on multiple layouts). Sometimes, I will pretty much be done except for actually taping everything down. Other times, I am not quite sure what else I want to do, so I’ll leave it less fully completed, while I think in the back of my mind about what to add or change. Knowing I’m not starting from scratch makes it easy to go back to it the next day. It’s easy – I just need to glue everything down, or I’ve had an idea and I’m excited to go finish it. When I finish the layout, I am excited and “in the groove,” so I am excited to start a new layout and I will work on it, but not finish it, and so the cycle goes.

So, how else can we find the motivation to start? Years ago, I followed the Flylady system, which was great, and while I found the emails overwhelming, I did pick up a some good ideas. I rarely buy in fully to any system, but rather, take what I want, or find valuable, and leave the rest. She has a line that “you can do anything for 15 minutes” and advocates setting a timer for 15 minutes and just starting. She gives you permission (and actually advocates) to stop when the timer goes off (as she believes that if it’s a huge job and you spend too long doing it, then you actually get tired and it destroys your motivation). It’s easy to say, “I only need to do this for 15 minutes.” I used this often when looking at an overwhelming project like cleaning or organizing the crawlspace or the laundry room (or for that matter, my craft room some days). I am always truly amazed at what I can accomplish in 15 minutes, and if I don’t finish, then at least I am more motivated (or less overwhelmed) to continue the next day.

I have been working with a life coach, Candice, for a couple of months (how I started is a great story which I will have to write about one day). She was my English instructor for the course I took earlier this year and we got to talking about her finishing her life coaching and I volunteered to practice with her. I am loving it! A couple of weeks ago, we were talking about motivation and she mentioned Martha Beck’s concept of “Turtle Steps.” Candice described it as the smallest amount of energy you think you can expend before it becomes “painful.” For example, if I am feeling overwhelmed with the idea of exercising, my turtle step might be to do 5 minutes on the elliptical, so I do that. If at the end of 5 minutes, I’m feeling OK, then I can keep going, but the moment it starts to feel not OK, I stop. That way I teach my body to trust my mind and I don’t turn it into something that will work against me in the future. She further explained that consistent slow progress over time is better than hard core short- term effort. I think she has a point. (I read a good blog post about turtle steps here)

So, I’ve practiced turtle steps, 15 minute timers and building on my motivation through action this past week and I admit that I feel they have truly helped. Starting, however you do that, is truly the hardest obstacle to overcome.