Navigating Human Dynamics: Insights from my DISC Journey
I was first exposed to DISC in 2016 and remember taking some basic training and thinking it wasn’t really helpful. My husband did an assessment as well, and we came back as the same style which stumped me since I didn’t think we were the same at all. I also thought I was more “I” than “S” because I felt I was more extroverted.
As I started learning more about DISC, however, I recognized how accurate it actually is. As I understood the differences between active and reserved, I realized that I am an S style (since active and reserved don’t mean extrovert versus introvert). And spoiler alert: my husband and I are the same style and I see it now.
It’s been a journey to where I am now, and I have learned a lot, so I thought it might be helpful to share some of the things I’ve learned that have surprised me.
An overused strength can be a weakness
The first time I heard that, I had to let it sink in and then I still didn’t really get it, but it makes sense now. In my training, they said to put “too” in front of any strength to understand the weakness.
For example, if patience is a strength, then overusing it makes you too patient. That could mean:
You aren’t willing to make a decision
You take too long discussing a problem before solving it
You give people too many chances
None of these on their own is an automatic weakness, but they can lead to challenges.
DISC doesn’t tell you what you can or can’t do
I remember reading my assessment report and thinking – I can totally do that (I can’t remember what it was, but I scored a -4 on it whatever it was).
As I realized that that -4 didn’t correlate to my ability, but more to my comfort doing it, I started nodding my head.
DISC tells me what is natural or comfortable for me. I can do things that are not natural or are uncomfortable, but they take more energy and under pressure or stress, I won’t naturally do them; I’ll revert to what is natural and comfortable.
Knowing what takes me more energy helps me recognize when I need to build in time to recover, or when I am going into a situation where I will feel uncomfortable. Knowing that in advance helps me not just retreat and give up.
Reserved is not introverted
I first equated active and reserved with extroverted and introverted, which is not correct. Active correlates with being willing to take risks, make quick decisions and process through talking. Reserved correlates with being cautious, being slower to make decisions and process through thinking.
Active people will make decisions and then sort out the plan. Reserved people want to make the plan first so they can make the right decision.
DISC gave me language to understand how I had naturally adapted to other people
After a somewhat challenging conversation with my husband wanting an immediate decision, I learned that I needed to give him time to reflect and work through challenges and ideas. I knew that I didn’t like conflict and felt uncomfortable in large groups where I didn’t know many people.
My DISC assessment helped clarify these for me, and give me words to clearly articulate what I kind of knew but couldn’t easily articulate. It gave me a road map for how to adapt to other styles. I had naturally done some of that before, but now I can avoid some of the trial and error of it.
DISC can have an immediate impact on a team
I was part of a board where communication was challenging and we were really struggling. There were several contributing factors, but we did DISC assessments and training and the impact was immediate; we did the training Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning, our conversations felt different. We had three D styles and a strong I style leader. Once the D styles understood that the team building portions of the meeting were important to others, they were able to be more patient. And we learned that shouldn’t take their direct responses as argumentative, and that being direct and focused was important too.
There is always more I can learn
I watch webinars, read blogs and dig into my report all the time. I am always learning more; about the model, about myself and about how to be more successful as I communicate and interact with others.
I reference DISC all the time now
It took me awhile to realize the power of understanding DISC, but I’m a raving fan now. I love some of the comments I get from people:
It’s like you were in my brain and spit it all out into my report
OMG – you nailed me
Now I understand how others see me and why they think I’m intimidating
I hated group projects in high school and they were always a struggle and now I understand why
I’m thankful for what I’ve learned in the past 8 years and looking forward to continuing on my learning journey.
What’s Next?
Read other blogs abut DISC
Sign up for DISCover Connections
Sign up for Leadership Toolbox (there is a whole section on DISC)
Contact me to bring DISC to your organization
Watch YouTube videos about DISC
